Whole30 and Detoxing and Dollar Tree Dining #88

I have a huge confession to make to you, dear reader. I have a guilty pleasure: food and diet blogs. Not the ones where they post 2,000 words about a 3-ingredient recipe and post pictures of the spatula from every angle. And not the ones where they talk about giving up caffeine or beer (who would do that?) But I LOVE documentaries like “Super Size Me” or blogs where somebody tries a fruitarian diet for a week and writes about it. Anything where I can obsess about the weird foods someone eats for a week.

Over the years, I have tried many different diets: I went fat-free in the 90s. And in the early 2000’s, I tried the high-protein, low-carb Atkin’s diet before there was paleo or keto. I’ve gone gluten-free and for many years, I was a vegetarian, even trying vegan for a day or two unsuccessfully. Recently, since the pandemic, I’ve been eating almost everything. However, three weeks ago, that all changed.

I started getting headaches and feeling just terrible all the time. I decided to reassess my diet, and I started writing down everything I ate. But I found that wasn’t hard: I was eating primarily carrots, toast, and chicken nuggets. And lots of coffee and beer. And, the kicker, entirely too much Aspartame.

It started innocently enough – I’m a big proponent of caffeine. In modern society, we don’t go very far without it. It keeps us motivated and happy. It cures depression and laziness. It makes life much smoother. However, I consuming entirely too much of it.

I would start with my morning coffee – one 6-cup pot, but weak, so it wouldn’t be too much caffeine, and I’d get hydrated. But then, at 7:30 a.m., as I sat down with a few pieces of toast, I’d crack open my first diet Coke. Next, I’d drink some Crystal Light around 10:00 a.m. And then, when I took an early lunch break for chicken nuggets and carrots at 11:00 a.m, I’d pour another mug of Crystal Light. Later, I’d maybe make some tea, but I’d add a few stevia packets to it.

Looking back over the last 2 1/2 years, I have been consuming Aspartame and stevia at an alarming rate. Then, three weeks ago, I realized I needed to detox from the stuff. But, let me go back another week. I was at a work event, and I was on my period, so I already felt awful. In addition, because of the work event, I was drinking a couple of beers every night. I was also eating a lot of work conference hotel chicken.

Midway through the week, I started having leg cramps and heart palpitations. I had a bad headache. I felt awful. I knew I needed to make some dietary changes.

I started by giving up Aspartame and stevia cold turkey. I didn’t cut back on caffeine, though. I still drank coffee in the a.m., but I replaced my diet Coke with green tea. And I started drinking water instead of Crystal Light.

I thought these changes would make me feel healthier. I didn’t expect the detox effect that my detox caused on my body. And it didn’t explain the leg cramps and heart palpitations. If anyone has ever done a detox, you know this experience: flu-like symptoms as your body gets rid of the nasties. It sounds like bs until you experience it. And I didn’t expect the flu-like symptoms to be accompanied with emotional symptoms as well.

The weird flu-like detox effect subsided after a few days, but the heart palpitations and leg cramps that woke me up in the middle of the night continued.

Then, I remembered my own advice when I’m feeling moody, depressed, or like I have an electrolyte imbalance: eat a potato (or a banana.) The potassium usually fixes me instantaneously.

I ate one potato, and I instantly felt better. The leg cramps subsided immediately. The random scary heart palpitations stopped. I no longer felt insanely thirsty with a thirst no amount of water could cure. I bought some potatoes and bananas, and I’m now eating them daily.

Some folks try Whole30 to start a habit of eating healthier. This was more like a Half15. I didn’t give up everything that Whole30 makes you give up. But I still avoid artificial sweeteners. I read labels more carefully. I avoid the Coffee Mates at work because they have corn syrup solids and god-knows-what else, and they don’t make coffee taste much better. I avoid MSG (mostly.)

It’s now been 3 weeks since I gave up Aspartame and stevia, and I feel completely different. I feel calmer. I feel balanced. My taste buds are more alive – even the most basic food tastes delicious! And I have not experienced “bloat” in three weeks! I still eat about 2,200 calories daily, but I’ve lost about 6 pounds since I started this experiment.

I promised Dollar Tree Dining, so here we go:

I was at Dollar Tree a few days ago, and while shopping there, I found oat milk. This morning, I thought it would be hilarious to make oatmeal and pour oat milk over it, which I did. This got me thinking: I eat soooo much chicken, at least twice a day. I would never be a good vegan because I can’t eat beans without feeling slow and bloated. However, why not try to be vegan one day a week? Just as a cleanse?

I am not a good candidate for vegetarianism, in general. When I’m a vegetarian, I’m sicker and dumber, and I get random bruises on my legs.

However, I can do anything once a week. My plan is to continue my normal diet (I cannot live without copious amounts of chicken) but I will try to eat a fruitarian diet on Sundays (vegan, but without beans.) I think this will serve as a cleanse without hurting me. And, it will be good for the environment to reduce my meat consumption.

Wish me luck!